Don’t be shy guys – Use those toys!
Many men are intimidated at the thought of using toys when they play with their lady lovers. Why is that? Well, what man wants to be compared to his lady’s 12″ black, vibrating, rotating, phallic monster that runs off household AC so there’s no batteries to die at a crucial point? What man feels that his woman isn’t totally and completely satisfied by his manly self?
I think that many women are also shy about the fact that they use vibrators, at least in front of their men. Vibrator use is pretty prevalent among mature women, especially those who have lived for years in a sexually unfulfilled state. I think it is becoming more common for women to talk about their toys with the men in their sex lives–and to talk about sex in general with them.
Some of you think this is a pretty damned obvious thing for me to point out. Some of you may actually think that your lady doesn’t have, need, or want a vibe, nor would she want you touching her with one–you are man enough for her and she just isn’t missing anything.
Gents, in the interest of promoting good, healthy, fun sex for everyone, I’d like to suggest that you re-evaluate your thinking on this subject.
Between couples, good useful sex toys can be a great enhancement to what is already a good experience. They can be another item on your menu, something you turn to for spice and variety on occasion. Your goal should be to use them to help BOTH of you enjoy what you are doing. Don’t think of the vibe as a replacement for your own monstrous and masterfully skilled tool, think of it as a method to increase her desire to have the REAL THING inside her. It’s an extremely rare woman who prefers the feel of plastic to the feel of warm pulsing flesh inside her.
If she is the kind who needs clitoral stimulation rather than penetration to have an orgasm (as the majority of women do) then consider using a vibe on her to help her more reliably and consistently reach her orgasm while you are having sex–she’ll be grateful and she’ll enjoy the fact that you wanted her to get the most out of the experience. Do it while you are inside her–don’t be afraid to let her steer, she knows EXACTLY where to put it.
The following are a few specific things to try with your very willing lady.
1. While you are going down on her, and she is already very hot and very much enjoying it, use a vibe (smaller ones are easier to keep out of your way–bullet vibes are great for this) around her clit and then on the tip of it if she can stand it. Don’t let her know it’s coming, just turn it on as you touch her–it’s a very rare gal indeed who will ask you to turn it back off.
She may want you to turn down the intensity or move the focus point, but she’ll probably like it. Ask her if she does and where and how you should move it–if she isn’t busy getting ready to yank your ears off, she’ll probably give you some feedback.
2. While you are going down on her slip a finger inside her. When your instinct tells you, turn on a bullet vibe and slip it inside her. Keep licking. Enjoy.
3. Here’s one of my recent favorites: While you are going down on her (notice the theme–I love to taste a lady who enjoys it) slip a finger inside her, then another well-lubricated one in her ass (you should have already determined if she is open to anal play). After she discovers how much she enjoys this, turn a bullet vibe on and slip it into her ass. [It’s best if you put it inside a condom first, it lubricates the process and makes retrieval and cleanup easier].
4. After you’ve made her cum repeatedly using the above two methods in series, roll her to her knees. The vibe falls down inside her to the front wall of her vagina and totally changes the focus. Now take her from behind. This one is fabulous. She’ll probably thank you…vocally.
Good luck!
——————————————— A quick story: I had a long-term lover who used to rely heavily on a very large plug-in model massager with a high power setting (she had burned out quite a few vibes over the years). She eventually believed me when I said it didn’t bother me.
One day when she knew I was on my way over, she lay on her bed and got busy, hoping my arrival would catch her at just the right time. As I came in she urged me to hurry to be inside her. She enjoyed just having the tip of me inside her for a moment.
It turns out she had been craving anal sex, so she asked me to indulge her. I slid inside her very easily because she was so very turned on. She got the wildest expression on her face and pushed back hard against me, taking me all the way inside her more quickly than I’d have tried by myself. When I say she came like crazy, I mean that she came so long and hard and loud that I started to worry about her. She had tears running from her eyes. She had always been pretty expressive, but this was amazing. She just couldn’t get over how good that felt and how different it felt from just using the vibe alone or even anal alone. She maintained that it was one of the best orgasms she ever had in her life. She became an even bigger fan of anal sex that day.
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